Technology...boon or curse?

Today I was talking to a colleague when she said that she finds her mind cluttered most of the times..I mistook this for her not being able to manage multiple tasks but she then clarified that its not management issue but issue is how to prioritize given so many distractions with the technology progressing at such a fast pace.Some blaring examples of technology killing some good habits..I see less people browsing through a newspaper..I myself am trying to develop the habit of reading from a normal newspaper as i generally tend to goto ibnlive.com and just glance at the headlines..

Take FB/Twitter..I mean what is the pressing need to always stay connected.Its right that it gives us a very big advantage but we should know how to use this quality of technology in the right way rather than letting it hog all of our time. Take Farmville, an application based game on facebook, if you start it once its so addictive believe me, I am a victim :D Well on one hand I realize that Internet has killed many things, i was reading on some site some of the things that Internet has killed. One thing mentioned was that "you are the only person not grieving the death of a celebrity" L.O.L its so true. Anyday a celebrity dies and you see, for instance on news sites links like "Light a candle" :D I never get their significance.

I see Internet as a wonderful way of passing time which can also be killing time..Social networking sites, chat applications, games, videos..name it and u have it..But I fear all of this takes much of our valuable time...

Another weekend :|

A Friday in the life of a Software engineer can be so hectic and so boring also.If you have worked hard 5 days..the two days relief might feel like a huge vacuum. And with a place like Bangalore, where you have not much places to visit, it becomes really difficult to pass time..If you have a group of frnds, it becomes all the more simple..otherwise more or less u are on your own to kill the boredom..

And I do not know whats with the recession these days, so many discount sales going on and on and on..So tempting!!It all boils down to mundaneness...life has become so routine that when you find an ounce of time, u end up wondering what to do..I would have run home if my native was near..but alas its not.. :(

People like me end up solitary most of the time..by people like me I mean, people who do not take the initiative to meet up with friends, yeah i do call up people..but it is difficult to be constantly in touch...

Somehow I have come to enjoy "My Time" with myself..its importance in my life has increased after I learnt to be on my own..not being dependent on any friend, any accomplice..Sometimes its a boon..sometimes a curse...

Mundaneness...

Sometimes I feel things are just so redundant, so mundane..so damn boring..we fail to enjoy them..the very monotony takes out all the lack lustre and there we are doing a thing just because it "has to be done"

How many of us call a friend because we really want to? how many of us do it with a sense of obligation?I, frankly speaking, do not call if I am feeling obligated..I'd rather call if I really miss my friend..or really want to talk to him/her..But I know in doing so..I might have lost many a friend in the process...Its so important to maintain the lustre, the charm of any relationship..how sensitive human relationships are...words can never express the depth..

One of my very good friends and me were once discussing how two people so much in love..so close..can still feel bored with each other..how the presence of a 3rd person changes things..and makes an event more interesting...A thought just struck me..I feel people shud give each other ample space..not always expect the other person to behave in a certain way..maybe that would make way for newer more surprising experiences..and rejuvenate relationships..alas it is easier said than done..

keep trying new things..keep visiting new places...keep surprising each other..with small gifts..maybe personalised gifts..maybe innovative ones..and pave the way for a new life everyday...

Appearances..how they matter so much...and how they can make u utterly conscious

ok..I have an inkling of the fact that sometimes I am given more attention than needed and more than I demand..And that really makes me feel conscious..Then I rather not think about my looks..or whatever...I mean ok guys would notice your face first..and if u have a good face...U would end up getting oodles of attention..sometimes its good..bt not all the times..

Like for instance..sometimes people don know how to really pay you a compliment..and you end up getting embarrased..one day in my office..I was paid a compliment in a way it din sound like on..I was wearing a red dress..and this guy..I totally disliked..was like..the color of your dress is reflecting on your cheeks..And I was like..what was that??? :D cheapo..din even know how to pay me a compliment..

And at times..people end up offering free advice when you havent asked for any..like the other day one of these guys in office was like..you shouldnt wear this dress..it doesnt suit u :O I wanted to ask him "dude did i even ask your opinion" Guys will be guys..wont they??

Ha ha..and one more recent experiences of mine..People will usually ask you things which are obvious..I had these red colored specs frame i bought..and one day i wore the same..and people were like new specs?? hee hee..gee i mean you feel good when people notice you like this..but sometimes it just gets to you :P

Conclusion : If you look good..and you are aware..to avoid consciousness..better forget abt ur good looks :D

Blank....

why is it so hard to comprehend even what you are feeling and why you are feeling this way or that way? And I have observed that I don try to dig too much..jus flow with the emotions..Like today..when I was out of office...I felt a void..a blankness in me..a strange kind of feeling which i cudnt fathom..It was something I did not want to think about..so I thought I would have a nice sandwich and head for killing some time at forum..

But then I felt with my mood..everything seemed dull..the sandwich waala made my sandwich the way I did not want it..and I ended up having it as a take away so that I could feed it to a street dog..Dogss..they are so cute..everyday I pass the same street and I see this nice furry stout dog..it din cross my mind that I was going to feed him...But when I passed the place he usually sat lazily..I found myself searching for this man's best friend..Somehow I feel a bonding with every doggie..may it be a pet or on the street..they seem equally loving to me..sigh...someday I will have a pet...And finally I found Mr mottuu..hee hee i jus thought it up now, this name for him, sitting on a nice sack like rug..lazing again..and I lovingly placed the sandwich for it to eat..it looked at me with such compassionate eyes..Well, I have strayed away from the main theme..

Okk..after the sandwich spoiler..anyways I did head for forum..talking to a buddy on the way..so thankfully I wasn't so blank then. Once I did reach forum..I found myself window shopping..cos that is the sole option of killing time there when alone...no there are others..like I could take a book and sit in Landmark..But I did not have that much time and patience at that juncture...Unable to code a certain thing, a certain work was still doing some rounds in my head....somehow I wanted to let go of those thoughts..I did forget the work part..but again I said everything proved that whatever be your mood..is how you would see the things around..Like they say..Laugh and the world laughs with you, Cry and you cry alone..ok ok I wasnt crying...but yes I wasnt feeling all that good..well people in my proximity thankfully contributed nothing to worsen my mood...

With every shop I window shopped and loitered in, I felt every store had some crap that was atrociuosly priced. Brands seemed only namesake..or I think they are..2000 ruppees for a tracks..damn! Nike Reebok..Bullshit!! Only amusing things I could find were in Archies ..a ridiculous soft toy named Funny Bunny..it looked more stupid than funny...Wallets..earrings..watches...oh this material world...Somehow I did not get peace of mind..came to my mind, maybe a bite would help..Went to Mc D after ages..Ordered for this Mc Veggie Burger..in the name of Veggies it had only lettuce :( what the....Thereafter I decided, it was enough killing time and I headed back home...back to my room..still feeling blank....

Sometimes....

Sometimes I just do not understand my emotions, my mood swings or probably I do not want to attribute the change in mood to any particular event or person..I am so much not in control of myself then..like a wave which washes away the patterns made on sand, i get washed away in my uncontrollable emotions..And sometimes the after effect isnt good and i regret my feeling that way..

               Image Credit

But then why?? why should i not give a vent to my outburst of emotions or whatever it is , maybe its PMS i keep feeling...My emotions are not trivial..my emotions/my mood swings are my own, I cannot compare them in magnitude or intensity to the feelings or emotions of others..Why then should i belittle the way i feel..may it look eccentric...but thats how i feel..

But then i got this wierd thought that if i isolate myself...my crazy emotions would not hurt anyone..and somehow i feel this is the best way out..Better to take it yourself than let it ravage others..yes I think thats what I am going to do...

Emotions are but ripples when the calmness of your being is perturbed by a stone being hurled in it...But of course the ripples get pacified in due course of time...so also I will pacify myself                                                     

Do you believe in "nazar lagna"???

Well, a series of incidents that happened with me led me to ponder abour "Nazar lagna" and I thought of writing about it. This whole discussion can be wrt rational thinking or beliefs. But my endeavor is just to pen down my thoughts about the same. Any comments are welcome.

From quite some time, I observed that I was having some bad experiences, majorly small accidents..Like one day i kept my step on a moving treadmill and fell down with a thud thankfully did not hit my head with any machine..although there was a heavy iron machine very close to where I had fallen..I thanked God and moved on although I was shaking after that incident..

Then again one day i fell down from the steps..and ended by bruising my leg..this again was very minor..And very recently..I got burnt from pressure cooker steam..have this nice brown patch on my shoulder..I managed to save my face or GOD did..at that very moment i din react but later on i was in tears thinking that the steam could have burnt my face..Face which is our first image to others, which is so damn crucial a part of our personality..I was shuddering after the whole incident happened..

All these incidents led me to think that I am going through a bad time in my life..But can we actually prevent such happenings..My friend told me you visit the temple..I said I will..but before these events occured, it never crossed my mind to visit the temple..

The same argument I can apply to Luck..some ppl dont really believe in luck.I have a friend who does not believe in good or bad luck..He says whatever is is a by-product of his actions..and yes, i also want to believe the same..but i end up believeing not...since i do believe in 'kismat' Do you think its wrong to believe so???

Grease Monkey!!!!

Hey I am an avid use of Mozilla Firefox..cant use IE anymore..and i am totally a fan of the addons in Mozilla..

I think they are quite innovatively created..greasemonkey for example..and mouse gestures is also a good instance of this fact..

by grease monkey u can actually download videos from youtube..check out this link for the same:

http://www.hackszine.com/blog/archive/2007/02/howto_download_youtube_and_goo.html

you will find it very useful..

ppl are welcome to tell about other useful scripts related to greasemonkey :)

Change is important..

How many of us believe in constantly changing things in our life..may they be trivial ones...maybe changing the wallpaper on the desktop..maybe listening to newer songs..well i strongly believe in and advocate change..its so very crucial to perdure the freshness in life and the daily activities, to keep your energy levels at an optimum high

I feel that change has much to do with, in fact its closely associated with one's comfort zones..As the name implies, a zone in which u find comfort and are at ease = comfort zone..but one should also strive to come out of it..Staying in your comfort zone always would actually defer the threshold of change...and CHANGE is necessarily important..for progress, for maintaining the lustre in everything..for retaining interest, for keeping ur energies consistent..

I have recently experienced a big change in my life, but of course for the positive and am looking forward to gradually transforming this change into one of my feel good, at ease zones :)

Am so lazy yet....

Well, Let me first begin by saying that the caption to my writing is not befitting. Its just that am too lazy to think of something very collinear..too lousy to actually blog of any one incident..most of the times I don't feel like writing but today I thought why not write, since its been long..not for the heck of it but since I want to..

Well it was my birthday on Saturday, was a good day must say..started with visiting a temple, got up early..dressed up in new clothes..there wasn't a need for it, since it was a non-working day but well, I felt good in new attire..you know how new things have a feel good factor :) like one day one of my gym mates was telling me that she purchased a new pair of tracks to motivate herself to come to gym regularly..isn't that nice??

And I cut three cakes :) that was fun, only sad part was i ended up hogging lots of eatables that my buddies had ordered for me and the all of us..and basically all my diet control till my birthday went haywire for the whole weekend...anyways diet control is something for which you need lots of will power :D

and these days i don have the will to resist tempting stuff like sweets, chocolates :D oh Lord, i wana resist those..warna weight ka kya hoga..hee hee..wish there was some magic wand..poof and u wud loose all the extra flab..

well, well..then all the VLCCs and gyms like these would run into major losses..what will all the world becoming health conscious, these money-minting entities are the ones who profit most..

I would prefer a gym anyday to VLCC , something that would add to consistency..not weight loss in a day..

anyways i would end abruptly here..don feel like writing anymore

A whiff of fresh Air :)

Today while waiting for my bus to office, accustomed to waiting for some min everyday, my eyes started wandering to the scenes in my vicinity and one such spectacle brought a smile to my lips . It was nothing extraordinary yet very sensitive and made me contemplate a bit later on..thats why i am also blogging about it.

What i saw was a south indian couple waiting for the BMTC bus, they seemed much below middle class..but the happiness that i saw in their eyes was amazing..the husband had their baby in his arms, and he was lovingly gazing at the baby now and then..the baby was sweetly in slumbers, maybe knowing that he/she is in papa's hands :) and the wife was also smiling, maybe out of the satisfaction it brought her to see their child, under the soft shadow of his/her parents..And this whole scene softened my heart and i realized how incredible it is to love, to feel loved, to express love....

Love shone in its soft light :)

Gymmming

Man, its hardwork working out :D n specially if one is lousy..takes a lot of determination & will power to step in and strive to stay fit..well, but i have resolved not to give up.at least i am going to try to regularly go to the gym....I had been to the gym after about more than a month or so..also, wen i go after a long gap...body aches like anything, but then u have to take some pains to gain something :)

And health is something one should always take care of....stay fit, stay healthy,stay energetic :)
A healthy mind resides in a healthy body after all.Wonder how some people just dont put on weight, envy them sometimes :D but then its not all that bad being healthy, mind it healthy n not fat or obese.....jus need to keep procrastination aside and let go of your lousiness :) and boom! u wil have a fit body of which u can reap benefits long term

since last 5 days i have been going to the gym, and am affirmative about the fact that i will soon complete 50 days and more....

Good bye to passive unfit days and a warm welcome to Healthy and fit days :)

A Beautiful Scene..

14th May, 3:56 am

I don think I had ever seen such a beautiful scene in my life.And somehow, I took it as a good omen, an indication of good things to come.

I had just had a long & wonderful chat with a close friend after which i went to sleep.But sleep eluded me, pieces of my conversation that i just had with my pal kept coming back to my mind for no reason at all or you can say I didn't try to reason out why.

And suddenly what do I see? Against the silhoutte of the foilage ( my room window faces some trees) & facilitated by the curtain set partially aside (I have begun to sleep these days by setting the curtain a bit aside so that light from outside kindles the room a bit) , the serene & breathtakingly beautiful moon literally peeping at me through the window :P ...

A marvellous view it actually was...cause the dark clouds intermittently kept shadowing Chanda Maama :) and its brilliance and then when the clouds would uncover it, Chanda maama would again dazzle & gleam with His soft & tender light..I felt as if God was looking down gently at me with a look on His face, a look analogous to the look on a mothers' face when she looks at her newborn baby, a look of extreme tenderness,care & love , I felt the Divine in the tenderness of moonlight.And at that very juncture, I felt that God is Great..I had had a wonderful day on 13th and was thanking God for it in my mind when i felt God's hand on my head in this experience that i had..I love u God :)

Best Day of my Life till now :)

13th May 2006, this day i deem as one of the best day of my life.I dont want to forget these precious moments that i spent with my friends on this very day..whatever i am writing has already been penned down in my diary first :) ..and i felt like putting it in my blog too..so here i am typing the same words..

I feel like now i understand the real worth of friends..how in their very simple & elegant ways, they can make you feel as if you are on top of the world (at least for them, which is what matters than anything else) What i really felt was very difficult to pen down..Somehow words seem insufficient,trite ..but as one of my friends says, words are never enough..to manifest one's feelings

Wish i could capture the whole of this day in the form of a video, how i wish the human mind had a feauture like that of a handycam :) so that we could relive some moments by looking at the recording again..i know this sounds absurd..But i would do anything not to let these memories fade..without good friends, u never know what all you are missing in life..

I felt so elated and had such a wonderful day that i would like to tell my friends - Aarti, Khannu,Prachi,Kots n Zebu that "Pals, am glad I have you as my friends :)"

So happy i was that i forgot all my worries, tensions & was so much "in the moment"..Credit again goes to my wonderful friends..God Bless You all.

Wish it rains in torrents

Its become so hot lately that i wish it would rain in torrents.But then this would be part a selfish wish, part a selfless one..selfish because i wouldnt be thinking of the many impoverished people staying in make-shift abodes, would be such a pain for them..selfless because i know all the city people like me must be disgusted with the heat and praying to Meghraja(the King of Clouds) to be generous to them..and let it rain so that we can chill madi n not remain sakat hot like they say in Radio Mirchi these days....

Well, it did rain today, only for a few minutes, though it did provide a welcome relief from the usual heat that bangloreans are not accustomed to..and frankly speaking, i have begun to like bangalore..totally unlike the feeling i had when i felt alienated in bangalore, partially because of the weather, and also because i was fresh out of college,callow, like a new coat of paint which takes time to dry...what would i call myself now? mmmm, well cant definitely say dried paint...lol.maybe i can say fast color...now i know people are going to laugh at this analogy i have tried to draw...

i think i have strayed from my focus in this blog, 'Rain' , i just love the rain..and its a hackneyed statement,nevertheless, i would say it, the idea of a steaming cup of coffee alongwith savoring pakodaas & simply enjoying and silently appraising the pleasant monsoon..today i saw a gulomohar tree laden with scarlet red flowers after it rained and what a sight it was! the droplets gleaming like pearls formed a line on the branch..breathtakingly beautiful..and the fresh green lawns, myriad varieties of all plants, trees stood out because of their viridity and lush green appearance bestowed on them by the showers..

Sometimes i am grateful to God to have created simply amazing things that surround us and what we call as Nature, the environment in our vicinity which actually uplifts us many a times and that too asking for so much less in return...

Beauty ??? or inner beauty???

This topic i.e. beauty i have pondered over ample number of times. I know , i know its quite a trite topic to choose for blogging...but then its nt that trivial, is it?? people have their own notions, nevertheless, its an important worthy topic that can be discussed at great length.....but in todays hep & street smart world, beauty is an obselete term i guess, hep or smart or chic is more apt.

Well, what i feel is everyone is smart in his/her own way..and unique too..only thing is people fail to realize that..some people think very negative of themselves..self-esteem is then what we come to....If only u feel u look good, then u ought to..theres just a small gap between these thoughts i feel...i jus had a hairdo..and i feel it has added a lot to my confidence..lol. not that i was not confident before..

I think if u keep changing urself every now n then, it peps up ur life rather than the same monotony of things around you..freshens up ur mood, makes you feel good about yourself..and you don need to ask the world of whether it approves you..You are what you are.. :D

Solitude vs Loneliness

On saturday, i was with my friends, my dear friends having a fun time..we were watching Along Came Polly and jus before that we had our lunch together..after the movie ended, i felt the need for fresh air..n i expected someone wud come to drop me..well, the unexpected happened..n i moved out alone..on the road..and suddenly i felt this void..a void which i cud nt comprehend...and i think i was feeeling lonely?? now i don't know...but sometimes i enjoy being alone..and that is solitude..

i take my own time to do things..go alone shopping or mayb jus watch TV alone, but i have noticed that when i have company i tend to behave differently..which is actually strange..why cant i behave consistently..the other day i was sittin alone and a friend saw me..she asked me whether i was tense or tired..n i was none..aimless wud be the right word to describe what i feel when am by myself..but not always..sometimes i do feel elated for no reason at all..

i wonder if i understand myself!!!

Concetration going HAYWIRE

I wonder how people study for hours...today i tried reading with concentration for an hour and i found that i was getting too distracted.but maybe that was because i was sitting in my cubicle close to my workstation & we software engineer are too fond of surfing..lolz..

anyways i struggled to study some pages with undivided attention, succeeded to do that only for some minutes distracted by orkut, by office work..i even tried putting on music n studying but in vain

a friend used to tell me that music increases ur concentration level..however i have observed that it diverts my attention..mayb am not listening to the right music, maybe i should listen to music that am familiar to, that ways i wont pay heed to it...

day is almost coming to an end and am happy that i have managed to read some pages :D